Author Archive

The Myth of the Victory

Monday, June 14th, 2010

The NCAA assumes that having an ineligible player automatically benefits a team.  This was the rationale they used earlier this week when forcing USC to vacate victories.  The evidence to the contrary is overwhelming.  During the span in which the ineligible Student Athlete #1 partook in football contests, every game was a blowout with the exception of three… the only three where he was the deciding factor:

2006 Rose Bowl: USC vs. Texas - Student Athlete #1 curiously laterals the ball to the other team while running uncontested downfield.  The points he would have scored on that play alone would have made up for the margin of defeat.  Later, Student Athlete #1 stands around and watches his team fail to convert on 4th and 2.  His ambivalence clearly resulted in the failed conversion.  The game was lost.

2005 USC vs. Notre Dame - What would have been a dramatic yet
uncontroversial victory was marred in controversy when Student Athlete #1 placed his hand upon the back of a teammate who was in the process of scoring the winning touchdown. The game’s final result was verbally contested for years by the opposing team’s fans.

2005 USC vs. Fresno State - Student Athlete #1 blatantly disregards
his team’s strategy of winning the “time of possession” battle to
achieve victory.  Instead, Student Athlete #1 repeatedly makes his
team’s possessions as short as possible each time he touches the
football, turning an otherwise easy victory into a nail-biter.

These were the only three games where the ineligible player’s participation impacted a game’s result. (Could a single player ever be the deciding factor in a blowout?)  Not coincidentally, they were his team’s least successful performances. Thus, if the NCAA wants to adjust the outcomes of previous games to account for the ineligible player’s contributions, it should make USC vacate its one loss, and change the two close victories to blowouts.

Not everybody is a perfect person in the world: Part of qwesi.com’s “Ohio State Is A Respectable Place” series.

Monday, September 7th, 2009

“Not everybody’s a perfect person in the world. Everyone kills people, murder people, steals from you, steals from me, whatever.” - T. Pryor

***

This is a sharp contrast to the talking points being peddled by the Buckeyes during the week leading up to last year’s game against Southern Cal, when Ohio State wide receiver Ray Small said, “Here at Ohio State, they teach you to be a better man. [At USC], it’s just all about football.”

Football and killing, Ray. Get it straight.

killa

give him the damn tile samples

Monday, August 31st, 2009

I was flipping through channels the other night and I came across this gem:

From the show’s website:

With Tackling Design, Keyshawn showcases yet another one of his hidden talents and marks his place in the world of design and home furnishing.

Johnson will apply his love for furniture, fabric, and finishings to real-life settings as he helps clients renovate areas of their homes that require a bit of a design flourish.

The series follows Johnson as he tries to manage this cast of disparate assistants and exacting clients, all the while tackling a variety of interior design dilemmas with an eye for subtle sophistication.

As Keyshawn likes to say, “my designs speak for themselves…as long as everyone gets out of my way and lets me do it right!”

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Side note:

Upon Googling Keyshawn Johnson, it occurred to me just how long it took for him to lead storied Southern Cal back to No. 1.

Eight freakin years - - most of which he wasn’t even playing for Southern Cal.

uncloak!

Saturday, July 25th, 2009

Reebok wins contract, Air Sabbag II preliminary design released.

Friday, June 19th, 2009

OK Japanese?

Friday, June 19th, 2009

I never understood the concept of a flat tax until Mos Def explained it.

Uh, you guys aren’t the Lakers…

Wednesday, June 17th, 2009

On Monday, LeBron James and his entourage woke up and decided to go to the White House. Like myself, they had read in Esquire a few months back that Obama had been rocking the tie-less suit with ease.

The quartet then knew exactly how they were supposed to dress when they showed up at Obama’s door. They were going to fit right in . . .

Until the Prez pulled the ol’ SWITCH-A-ROO. Boy did LeBron and his friends feel stupid.

killing spree

Tuesday, June 9th, 2009


jackpot

Monday, June 8th, 2009

i love this game

Friday, June 5th, 2009